Where to stay & Bad Tourists

Right, so you have decided to visit Cape Town now you are looking for somewhere nice to stay. Where to start?

There are a lot of options. sometimes having too much choice can be confusing and you start to 2nd guess your decision. Trip Advisor is a great place to start. The cream always rises to the top so Trip Advisor won’t put you far wrong. The thing you have to remember about Trip Advisor is that only around 1% of people who have a great experience will bother to write about it and 100% of people who didn’t have a great time, will

Also, in Tourism we are dealing with the general public and there are a lot of neurotic fuck nuts out there. I have been lucky as most of Cape Convoy’s clients have been wonderful but even I have attracted some social hand grenades over the years. I had one window licker on the tour who tried to Kung Fu kick me in the head because  Lufthansa airlines lost her bag and another oxygen thief called D… accused me of trying to kill her adult children because they set of on a gentle hike to the Cape Point lighthouse and she thought they would be killed by Lions

And let’s not forget the woman who got drunk at 9 am, screamed at her husband and me, called us assholes and then ran off and promptly disappeared. A search party found her 5 hours later behind a rock close to the Cape of Good Hope (alive sadly)



                                    Hi Rob, nice to meet you. This tour better be good

So yes, I have to deal with weirdos every now and then but 99% of people are awesome so, let’s get back on point, where to stay while you’re here

Personally I would stay close to the Victoria and Alfred Waterfront for the following reasons

1. It’s safe

2. You have everything on your doorstep

3. You can walk around at night

4. After a long day of touring with Cape Convoy you don’t have to bother organizing        taxi’s to get something to eat and drink

5. It’s easy for tour operators to collect and drop you off

I have always liked the Victoria and Alfred Waterfront Hotel

The standard of guesthouses is very high in Cape Town although I have never enjoyed collecting clients from them as they always make me feel about as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit

So there you have it, the Victoria & Alfred Waterfront is, in my opinion the best place

Until the next time, keep it real and I hope to meet you on one of our fabulous Garden Route Tours



Your Pal


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